Gratitude as the Weapon Against Insecurity
- Alexandria Sinnamon
- 7 days ago
- 6 min read
Article by: Stephen Jones
Director of Discipleship Ministries
Cornerstone Conference IPHC
Hot take: I’ve never met a person without insecurities.
You might think my circles are inordinately small—that maybe I haven’t met very many people, that maybe I’m surrounded by weak people, or that maybe I just need to get out more.
But I don’t think the average person is overly self-confident.
Have you ever chosen a different outfit because of what someone else might say or think about you?
Have you ever changed your plans based on what others were doing, so you wouldn’t be left out of the fun?
When’s the last time you asked someone for their opinion on what you did—even though you know you were well-prepared and you know you did your best?
When’s the last time you settled for something you didn’t want just because of how you might be perceived (or misperceived) by others—even people you don’t know?
Insecurity is everywhere. We see it, and we tend to point it out in others, but it’s easy to dismiss in our own lives. It manifests in a variety of expressions, but in its basest form, insecurity is fear.
It’s an inherent sense of inadequacy that stems (often) from an unreasonable comparison to someone or something—it’s a hyper-focus on my own perceived flaws, personal deficiencies, or incompetence in comparison to someone or something else.
Those failures or shortfalls (whether actual or perceived) are dangerous because they so often shape decisions, devotions, and directions based on unfair comparisons.
For example, there’s no one who knows or even looks at me and expects me to be an outstanding athlete—but perhaps internally I’m still driven to try to *appear athletic to shape how others perceive me..
Or, no one is comparing the sermons I preach to those given by celebrity pastors on the internet—but maybe internally I’m afraid for anyone in my congregation to follow those preachers for fear of how that compliment might diminish me or my ministry.
So I change my outfits, my eating habits, or maybe even my pulpit-delivery style to create and uphold an image of myself that I want people to see.. which, according to the original meaning of the word, is hypocrisy.
No one likes a hypocrite...and we’re surrounded by them because so many people are ruled by their insecurities...those fears that determine how we live and move and be.
And the most irrational revelation rises to the surface when we admit the comparison comes from within—that our insecurities are born from within, out of our own fears. Our insecurities may have nothing to do with what others have *actually said about us or done to us.
We’ve simply given place to the enemy and his lies and have chosen to believe his criticism over the truth. We allow ourselves to believe those deceptions, and we take the next step in our decisions to change who we are to meet those unreasonable standards.
We wear the mask of who we want you to think we are to hide the fact that we’re dissatisfied with who we *actually are.
What a burdensome way to live.
It’s so difficult to maintain appearances, to keep the mask up—but it’s so much better than taking it off and admitting we’re not who we think we should be.
But what if we could find a way to beat back those lies?
What if we could move beyond a sense of our own inadequacies?
What if we could find true contentment in who we are and the work God promised to complete in us?
Did you know there’s a secret weapon?
If the Sword of the Spirit is truth (and in this case, the truth is our reborn identity in Christ), then the dagger that mortally wounds our insecurities is gratitude.
(Maybe you didn’t see that one coming.)
It’s amazing how this whole attitude of gratitude works—that being genuinely thankful about who we are, what we’ve been given, and where we’re going prompts us to focus on comparisons that matter...like Who God is and what He’s done and how He’s blessed me. It’s the “not seeing the forest for the trees” phenomena, or as I like to call it, the opposite of the “Pinch and Zoom phenomena.”
Do you know what I’m talking about?
Do you remember when Instagram rolled out that feature?
In August of 2016, the popular social media giant (now owned by Meta Platforms) instituted a feature users had been begging for—the ability to zoom in on pictures and videos posted in their feeds.
In the August edition of Cosmopolitan, Dusty Baxter-Wright wrote, “Using the simple 'pinch and move' technique that the likes of photo stream and Facebook have already adopted, stalking your best friend's cousin's boyfriend on Instagram has never been easier - because who wouldn't want to zoom in to see if there's cabbage stuck between his teeth?”1
When that article was published in 2016, Instagram had more than 600 million users.2
What happened when 600 million people were suddenly able to scrutinize the most meticulously curated content of their best friends... and frenemies?
Every user became a critic, and every user immediately became even more sensitive to their own weaknesses, flaws, and deficiencies...and covering those up became even more important, and difficult, and important-er.
And that already-loud voice of inadequacy was amplified to full volume in our hearts and minds...and our insecurities flourished.
But gratitude is different.
Gratitude flows out of humility.
It takes an honest assessment of self and circumstances.
It holds a realistic view of life, acknowledges what-is in relationship to what-could-be, and finds value in what-is...and with that sense of honest evaluation and commitment to reasonable comparisons, thankfulness flows out of a heart that is attentive to Biblical truth—and honest and fair with itself.
When insecurity focuses on our flaws, gratitude finds strength where others see weakness.
When insecurity flows out of our comparison to others, gratitude follows His standard of life and living.
When insecurity forgets the truth, gratitude forges confidence based on truth.
When insecurity forgoes purpose for position or possession, gratitude fights fear with His Promise.
The holidays are not as happy as they should be for too many people, and there are a multitude of reasons why people aren’t content or happy when the time comes to celebrate. But Christ-followers don’t have to fall into the pit of anxiety and insecurity. We can keep the fears of what others may think, say, and even do at bay simply by cultivating a heart of gratitude.
And it’s Biblical.
Consider Paul’s instructions to the church in Colossae; “6 Therefore as you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him, 7 having been firmly rooted and now being built up in Him and established in your faith, just as you were instructed, and overflowing with gratitude.”
The Biblical injunction is to live our lives in a state of gratitude; he noted to Timothy how we were not given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and self-discipline. If we can shift our perspectives to notice all for which we have to be thankful, then our gratitude for what we have can overshadow any comparison for what we don’t have.
And gratitude is a really simple habit to pick up if you’re willing to try. Take a second and try any number of these suggestions; reflect on a couple of them and see if your mood doesn’t shift.
Thank God for breath—that He woke you up this morning and gave you this day to live and serve Him.
Thank God for health—even if your health isn’t the best. Give glory to God for what He’s done and pray for the healing you need.
Thank God for mobility—to whatever extent you can get where you need to go, thank Him for that.
Thank God for provision—for all the ways your needs have been met, thank Him for meeting them.
Thank God for protection—for all the ways He has sent angels to guard and protect you.
Thank God for answers to prayer—for the times He’s intervened in your circumstances for your good.
Thank God for His Promises—acknowledge that His plan for your future is good, and He’s faithful to bring it to pass.
Thank God for your family—thank Him for the people in your life that love you unconditionally
Thank God for your friends—thank God for the people who choose to do life with you
Thank God for your job—even when it’s hard, gratitude for your work can shift your surroundings
Gratitude has a way of opening our eyes to what we have and blurs the focus on what we don’t.. and when we shift our focus onto Him and what He’s done, we can operate in gratitude and confidence over fear and insecurity.
Practice giving thanks over this Thanksgiving and see how genuine gratitude can change the atmosphere.
Comments