Monsters Under The Bed

Article by: Stephen Jones

Discipleship Ministries Director

Cornerstone Conference IPHC

Have you ever asked your teens about their biggest fear?

What do you think it might be?

Are they afraid of the dark? (nyctophobia)

Monsters under the bed? (teraphobia)

What about spiders or snakes? (arachnophobia or ophidiophobia)

Maybe they're afraid of heights, roller coasters, or flying? (acrophobia or aviophobia)

When we think about October and Halloween, the scariest images we conjure usually involve witches and goblins, zombies and axe-murderers—which is easy enough to understand considering how proudly our neighbors display those inflatables and lawn decorations every fall. Some neighborhoods I've seen have practically transformed into haunted villages overnight!

But talk to teenagers, and many will admit that being scared is actually fun! They enjoy the rush of adrenaline as the tension builds in a scary movie, and being chased by a zombie on a haunted trail is a great way to spend a Friday night in October.

When asked why, they readily acknowledge, "We know it's not real." In fact, one teen recently volunteered, "The Haunted Trail is actually the safest place you can be—it's filled with people and surrounded by security!"

So what exactly are they afraid of?

Perhaps the things that go bump in the night aren't nearly as frightening as the challenges we face in everyday life—at school, at the office, on the field, or in the workplace.

Of all the fears and phobias we could discover and define,

there are none more prevalent,

there are none more ubiquitous,

there are none that cross generational lines more than

the fear of rejection,

the fear of failure,

the fear of loneliness, and

the fear of the future.

What if you could make those into lawn inflatables? Would they scare off the trick-or-treaters?

I've never met a person who relished rejection, pursued failure, enjoyed loneliness, or reveled in uncertainty. These experiences are universally dreaded and avoided at all costs!

Unlike the imaginary monsters and manufactured scares of Halloween, these fears are real, and they're personal. They may never cause physical injuries, but each has the power to inflict real damage on our hearts, minds, and souls.

In fact, many of us would rather face a monster under our beds than deal with rejection one more time.

BUT, I'm glad to know we don't have to live under the weight of those fears—real or imagined!

The Bible is filled with a command repeated throughout both Testaments: "Do not be afraid" (Isaiah 41:10; Joshua 1:9; Luke 12:32). We have great and precious promises (2 Peter 1:4) that our Savior is not only with us (Matthew 28:20), but that He neither slumbers nor sleeps (Psalm 121:3–4), that He will preserve our souls (Psalm 121:7), that He will complete the work He began in us (Philippians 1:6), and that He will one day return so that where He is, we may be also (John 14:2–3).

We don't have to allow those phobias or insecurities to direct our decisions. We don't have to live consumed by worry about what we will eat or drink, what we will wear, or how we will face tomorrow (Matthew 6:25–34). We can be led by the Spirit (Romans 8:14) and comforted by the strength of the Shepherd (Psalm 23:1–4). We can depend on His provision (Philippians 4:19) and trust His guidance (Proverbs 3:5–6).

We are more than conquerors through Him who loved us! (Romans 8:37)

Of course, knowing these promises doesn't mean we'll never experience rejection, failure, loneliness, or uncertainty. But it does mean we don't have to be controlled by the fear of them. God's promises give us the confidence to face what frightens us, knowing that we never face it alone.

And that's a truth worth sharing with our teenagers!

So, for the sake of meaningful conversation with your teens, consider asking them a few of these questions. As a bonus, spend some time together exploring the related passages of Scripture to discover what it means to live confidently and victoriously in Christ.

1. The Fear of Rejection: When did you feel most rejected by someone? Do you think that experience changed how you acted or affected your decisions afterward? How does Scripture address our fear of rejection? (Psalm 34:17–20)

2. The Fear of Failure: Can you think of the biggest failure you've ever experienced? How did that moment change you? How is God's love for us an antidote to the fear of failure? (Romans 8:28, 38–39)

3. The Fear of Loneliness: Do you think loneliness is a real problem? How do people cope with loneliness? How do you think God wants us to respond when we feel alone? (2 Corinthians 1:3–4)

4. The Fear of the Future: Does thinking about the future make you hopeful or fearful? Why? How can we live above the fear of the future? (Psalm 37:23–24)